We sometimes find that our different family lines have a funny way of speaking to each other across the generations. They send secret messages back and forth, like little classroom love birds, waiting for the teacher to turn her back. That is to say, these messages are not always obvious. While researching our Carr line, we recently received such a message—an epiphany, really—and we thought we would pass it on.
Our grandmother was a Dragoo (Nancy Luetta Dragoo). Our grandfather was a Carr (John Ewing Carr). The two were not exactly the type to send love notes back and forth—not that we know of at least. Nonetheless, on our Carr side—as on our Dragoo side—we find many individuals who were obsessed with spreading the love of family history and the value of our family stories. One such individual was Edward Marston Hussong, our Grandfather Carr’s first cousin once removed.
In The Hussong Manuscripts, Edward Hussong relates his memory of visiting his Aunt Emmeline Hussong Carr in the Ozark Mountains in 1880. Aunt Emmeline—our second great grandmother—was renowned for her virtuosity in matters of family history and family lore. Edward Hussong writes of his aunt,
"Besides matters of her own life and experience, she had copied from older records a wealth of historic fact, and had stored in memory riches of family lore and tradition unsurpassed. She knew her grandfather Conrad Hussong nearly 20 years before his death and gathered much from him in his later days."
Emmeline sent Edward on a lifelong quest to elaborate on and share these family riches. For example, Grandfather Conrad Hussong lived in the Watauga Settlement, State of Franklin, which is present day Northeast Tennessee. It was said of Conrad and Conrad’s father, John Henry, that they were present during the Revolutionary War’s infamous Battle of Kings Mountain. According to Emmeline,
"Yes, John Henry was one of the militiamen that went to the Battle of Kings Mountain. His oldest boy, Conrad, ran off and followed with another squad of them two days after. They nearly starved as they could not stop for hunting. [Conrad] could tell no-end-of stories about those times. I’ll try to tell you some of them before you leave."
And tell she did, leaving Edward where many of us are left: to discern and discover the value of these stories for himself, for his family, and for the generations to come. Also like many of us, try as he might, Edward could not always find the documented “facts.” And so this is the secret message—and maybe it’s no secret to you: The value is not only in the “facts”—the genealogical value—but also in the story itself, the so called “lore.” The facts support our ability to link our ancestry together to trace our biological roots. But there is a secondary value, something that Edward was trying to share with us, and Emmeline before him: the value of the story! The lore of the family.
Just as the “facts are the facts,” the “lore is the lore.” It is there! It has been told and passed down just like any other family heirloom. The lore is a part of us—perhaps even more so than the facts—because they allow us to trace our emotional (or some may say “spiritual”) roots. These stories are what our ancestors believed—or wanted to believe. They are the pride and sense of identity that they wrapped around themselves and, to this day, attempt to wrap around us, their descendants. What do they tell us about ourselves, about our traditions, and about what our family has valued? What morals or lessons do they impart to our generation, and to the generations to come? These are our questions to answer, and these are the “secret messages” we are called to pass on.
We are not advocating just making stuff up, and we are by no means denigrating the need and great value of genealogical and scholarly family research. But what we are saying is that room can and should be made for the stories themselves. When we make room for each other’s stories, we make room for each other. And that’s the real love story.
P.S. Incidentally, we presently don’t have a great deal of evidence of John Henry and Conrad Hussong’s involvement in the Revolutionary War. Although not improbable, and certainly worth continuing the effort to find the facts, the facts are wanting. But you see, that’s another story!